This page is a continuation of my creative writing... It will be updated when I have a reason to show people what is on my mind.. for now.. I am just going to keep it to myself... Suffer...
Ahhh screw it.. here it goes:
where's my baby at, when I'm slidin in the sheets,
where's my baby at, when I am hearing those beats
little does he know how my love grows
and that while he is away
I don't need no play
that while the night comes
I'll be waitin for his drums,
so he can bring on the beat
that baby makes me sleep
into his lovin arms I'll know it's true
so can feel his love pushin on through
where's my baby at when I'm sliding in the sheets,
where's my baby at when I am hearin those beats
The night was cold.. and the window was open. I reach down and pull the comforter up over my bare shoulders and then I feel you behind me. Your hand slides up over my back and around my middle. It tickles a little and I smile. I feel your chest to my back, your heart beat, steady, your lips to my neck, snuggling me into you. I reach my hand down and twine my fingers around yours not wanting to let go, to ever let go. My cat pounces on the end of the bed, crawls up and lays on your side. I smile.. feeling like home. Your fingers you take back from me and slide down my side. You trace little lines and I can feel anticipation build. That little spot.. you always find it.. and I cringe from your playful tickling, but can't help but find myself giggling. The cat quickly runs from the room.. and I move to wiggle away from you until I find myself on top of you pinning your hands down and laughing.. just enjoying all of you, your smile so good so filling. Your eyes say it all.. and we are at peace.
The Train
Taking each day as the last is already gone, thirsty holding onto the fresh water glass, slipped and is lost in the ocean, salt in the wound now numb, she can no longer hurt you.
You've beaten the train this time, vanity gone you invited your disheartened to ride along with you and the scenery is grand as the lights flash on and off again bringing you closer.
The hook missed again, just lightly grazing the back of your neck and sweat rolls down the side of your face. The tall dark shadow once lingered now finds a seat in a different car opting for another who's heart has stopped beating.
You wait for the other train to pass so that you can leap, it must be fast.. it must be the right time or you will find ourself on the tracks...
Call Me Angel
Call me Angel because you believe
touch my cheek and taste my skin
remind me of what I am here for
help me to forget that painful sin
You aren't the men of before
you aren't the heartache from the past
you are something different
you are something I want to last
Place your finger upon my lips
seduce me with your simple ways
make me believe you have come
to save my beautiful days
I believe in you while you stand
arms around me still
I am hopeful of that growing love
oh how strong grows our love's will
and I can let you drive
protect me with your love
and I will be woman of your dreams
while the wind sweeps away doubt from above
It is to you I trust you ask nothing still
and it is what we have cared to play
that is bringing my love to you
to be shared every day.
Will I?
May 8, 2002
The driving rain
couldn't keep me
from you eventually
It tries to take me
away from you but it
will not win
the sun the following
morning doesn't
mean a thing to me
without your dawning
my simple day
screams to stop
my will no longer
strong to your intent
weak to your love
Like a disease
I am crippled to you
do as you will I dream
I close my eyes
to hesitate is not mine
instead I jump
But... will I fall?
Hush now and watch
April 24, 2002
Deep color so dark into a different dreams eyes
are we walking I whisper
and you say just hush now and watch
the lights above us dance and I smile
I laugh to my delight a child like way
and it is not what I felt before that keeps me
but what I haven't known before that temps
and leads to think a single star twinkles
And when I look at you, your soul aged beyond
who are you and why did you come
and you whisper again hush now and just watch
and I can't help but be caught
Hush now and just watch you say again
I didn't even ask yet but you knew I was going to say
so I obey your command to let this happen
I close my eyes and hush now and I watch for your hand
What you created... you will never know
April 24, 2002
Part of you hoping that I died inside
and wait for you in my coffin world
for you to awaken me again
but I have surpassed your awakening
And I don't want what pill you give
because it only woke you to fall asleep
again you trip into your sweet blind ways
and I laugh into the darkness knowing what you don't
And I once thought my belief was enough
but it was the green history that kept you
and the conforming ways of your dreamless night
that paint you numb and took you where you think to be
That low laugh, that knowing laugh and you don't know
you don't question too queer in your own mind
to even see how ugly it really is you're weighted down
and you have all you wanted, they let you believe
Remember that taste how sweet my juice to a new year
to you I sang but now you don't get my words
and I tossed the sheets to the wind
letting my sleep leave me forever dead to the show
And you can't be strong when you have
nothing to resist nothing to question nothing to give
you told me you danced naked the scars to show
but it was all a garden of fake flowers you showed me
Take them those plastic nights and pretend
they will also pretend for you a well disguised hell
the false tears, the false ways, the false dreams
and I walk barefoot to life's discarded glass shards
And tell me how the view is from down below
because I am so high without you
the dreams dance again ripping apart the facade
what you created.. you will never know.
Entropy
April 23, 2002
A jaded veil fallen over my eyes
like chainmail it fends off the dragon
My life a state of entropy
gone from those sedate days to disorder
I am warmed by these days
The sun only brings me light on this night
not needed to warm a mind gone to living
I entropionise my thoughts shocking my system
bringing a smile slowly to a day once gone to frown
and I don't know where it leads
Could you dance the flowers entreat
my feet move to this beat and beg to feel
the floor I laid with my own imagination
soft beneath my tentative toes
now entrapped by this growing dream
My exigency faded into black nightmares
the moon hides them behind its darkness
the misogynist loses his sight
and I come to question what it means
but let the unknowing delightfully coat me
The questions unanswered and unworried
too harsh the cold light could bring
instead warm retreat to laughter we feel
something stronger than one dance upon night
and the veil falls to the ground my eyes to see
And it is spring renewing a lost youth
a present to the soul
and like a teething child screams
the new causes pain to only blossom to beauty
and I awake on the path again ready to walk.
Bring it on
Bring it on
take it out of me
push me farther than I have gone before
challenge me:
make me cry in pleasure
make me growl in pain
make me remember you
make me want you
make me damn you
make me love you
make me want to be bad with you
make me want to do what I dream
make me mad at you because you can do this to me
and then tell me you love me
I will be yours forever but myself for even longer
not to betray a heart that still believes
in love.
Untitled
I fell and the hill scratched my knee
the scab left a scar and I knew that you would be with me forever
Drunk in my lost fate hopeful in the loss
the dream came stronger even though it was already far gone
I look now to the setting sun knowing you are there
somewhere there is a cloud you see and it makes you think of me
One day you will be free again
I know it will be true that rusted chain you spoke up you'll break
But for now you dance in that circle
around again, around again looking off to the sides to see me
No longer the wallflower I stand out from the crowd
and you may once again long for my smell to surround you
and bring you the dreams again.
Daddy is Callin
February 14, 2002
Your daddy needs you my love
so let go of the past
he is there now at your feet just askin
for something you can give
Sweetheart don't remember that he wasn't there
just remember your son lookin at you
and think about what he would do
if it were you at his feet singing the blues
Sometimes they are lost I remind you
and they need us to show them the way
You sigh and look at me love
knowing what you know is true
It isn't for you to turn away this time
it is for you to be better than that
your son's eyes will look upon you one day
and will he turn away?
Show compassion, resist the wall
your daddy is callin again wanting to hear it from you
you only have one and you have to make it last
the past is only gone be beyond the broken pieces
We can only do so much for those we love
as I would do for you forever my dear
so when your daddy comes a' calling
just tell him he has no fear and give him your hand
G'Damn
February 09, 2002
G'dam I need it like only you can give it
Yeah you, the one with eyes of blue slip it in
why don't you
Is that too cold, did I hurt your feelings
Yeah you, the one I used to make love to take it again
I want you
The way you take me by the neck and whisper
Yeah you, the one who whispering fuck you making me hot
wanna fuck you
There you go teasin me again make me want it
Yeah you, doin what you do not giving a damn for me
taking all too
And you know I give it freely if you should just ask
Yeah you, pull me again tight to you and leave your mark
I love you